fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
40s are totally the cure
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
