i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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