i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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