How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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