He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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