Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize