I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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