their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
i need to put some appletini on your dick
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
