But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
she looked like the before picture.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Randomize
