I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
