I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
