totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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