just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
