So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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