are you still at the devil's house?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
