Need sex. Gaining weight.
high people should be assigned attendants
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
