She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
