I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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