Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
is wine microwaveable?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
