There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize