I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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