There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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