Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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