i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
