Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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