omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Do you remember whose house we're in?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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