i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
