Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
