yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize