Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
