I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
