I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
