i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Buhtt sex?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
