Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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