All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
