IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
