I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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