Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
