I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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