Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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