Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
