whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
