Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
