i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
