Me. At least after what I've been through.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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