direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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