Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
