Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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