Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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