is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
