Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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